Tag: featured
Continental Detective Agency vs. The Legion of Crime
Golden Gate Bridge Climb
John Law recalls:
16 people went on this climb. This was way too many. Dmitri said to me at one point: “Gee John. I almost passed out back there.” I reassured him & never got outside of arms reach all night. This was the largest group I ever lead on the GGB. Plenty of chills! This climb was long before we got to the top of the tower. (For the next year straight we climbed the tower repeatedly, as much as once every week or two searching for a way to get to the top of the tower. These climbs were by invitation and I only asked good climbers. Some of them were: Pierre, Jayson, Randy Raines, Bob C., Peter F. etc. We made it to the level just below the top after a couple of times. It was very difficult, however to find a way into the one shaft that exited into the top beam and this search took almost a year).
Sewers of Oakland
John Law recalls:
The first event I organized. Dave remembered some storm tunnels he had explored as a kid. Dave, Gary and I scoped these tunnels one afternoon. We entered upstream at Mills College (all girl) in one of the tunnel inflows that Dave remembered from 35 years before. We went downstream trying to find a good place to bring a group in to the tunnels for an upstream walk culminating at the fenced in and pastoral Mills Campus. Several sections of the waterway further downstream were fenced in troughs running through residential backyards, industrial areas, and school grounds. These stretches would, after a few hundred feet or yards revert back to underground tunnel. A few spots seemed tactically possible for a group entry. We kept pushing for the bay in order to do a complete survey and perhaps find a better entry point. The closer we got to the bay the deeper the dense silt buildup along the tunnel floor became. We found ourselves in an uncovered section along the freeway, close to sea-level. Dave was 50 feet ahead of us and having a harder go of things due to his gimp leg and the necessity of walking with his cane. Leaning heavily on the cane he turned to look at Gary and me. The cane, with Dave’s full weight bearing down on it started sinking in the silt. We watched as, in slow motion Dave sank, sideways up to his armpit in mud. Gary and I were laughing so hard we were unable, for several minutes to help extricate Dave’s 240lb frame from its deep berth in the mud.
We picked an entry point in a fenced section fully enclosed inside a grade school ballpark/playground near East 14th St and 62nd St in Oakland’s most dangerous black ghetto. The tunnel went underground almost directly under the home plate. The fifty or so explorers parked their motley pack of vehicles along a tree-lined section of the ball diamond on a Saturday night. The neighborhood rarely entertained one white face, much less fifty at once. We were acutely aware of how much we stood out and some of the potential dangers we might encounter before slipping into the safety of the sewers. We drew the attention of a couple of kids as we furtively shuffled into a dark corner alongside the playing field. We were quite worried that the kids would inadvertantly expose us to their older, no doubt armed brothers. I told them exactly what we were doing. “We’re all going into the sewer and walking for miles underground”. I figured their interest in such a bizarre plan might keep them from rushing to find their friends and give us enough time to get underground before further detection. They were very interested in going with us underground. I kept putting them off as we climbed laboriously, one at a time over a fence, down rebar steps into the ankle deep water and into the safety underground. Our entry point was between and very close to two houses directly behind the ball diamond. The possibility of arousing an armed householder was quite real and we were sweating pretty badly. Gary, Bob and I were helping folks climb over the fence. The kids were going to try and come with us into the sewer. I told the kids that they could come with us if they went and got their parents permission “because of the alligators”. One kid said “there ain’t no alligators in there”. I explained about people flushing gators down the toilets and how they grew in the ideal climate of the sewers, eating rats, etc. I told them they could actually help us fend off the gators (once they had got back from getting parental OK) if they would bring back some big branches or posts to use as clubs. By then we had almost everyone in the trough and were assembling at the tunnel mouth. The kids ran off to get their clubs. We ditched them by speeding the group up into the quiet and enveloping safety of the sewer.
Baby Beautiful Contest
March 11, 1977
Baby Beautiful Contest
Here is the announcement in the first SC nooseletter in Feb 1977
John Law recalls:
Entered shill baby: Sweet Pea Sheffield: Ron & Shirley as folks, borrowed a real baby from someone. Dave W. Covered in pink Calamine lotion, paper mache head, big lolli-pop. Gary kept laughing so hard he was almost entirely useless. Adrienne, Bob C., I & others helped Dave (who was almost entirely blinded by his fake head). He tottered out onto the main stage at the War Memorial as Sweet Pee was announced by the elderly gal who was Mc-ing. He came up from behind her and everyone (mostly families) in the audience saw Dave but not the MC. I almost peed I was laughing so hard. Dave toddled past the MC (who’s hands fell to her side and jaw went slack as she comprehended Dave/Sweet Pee. Dave stumbled upstage, bumped into the table with the trophies on it almost knocking it over (a couple actually fell over but not, fortunately to the ground). It looked like he was going to fall off the stage (a drop of 4 feet at least) so we retrieved him and hightailed it out to the lobby where we shot the photos.
photos by Bob Campbell:
Treasure Hunt
Rick Lasky recalls:
“I was jogging in the Richmond District near where I lived when I had a flash of inspiration. Wouldn’t it be cool to organize a treasure hunt around the city? I knew just who to take this idea to: Gary Warne. So I went to Gary’s bookstore “Circus of the Soul” and told him my idea. He said, “Rick, I’ve had the very same fantasy. Let’s do it!”
It was Gary’s crazy idea to hold it the night of the Chinese New Year’s parade in the North Beach/Chinatown area. We agreed to split the writing of the clues. Gary did the first half, I did the second half. It is amazing to me now how much cooperation we got from the businesses then. I asked the folks working at Uncle Gaylord’s ice cream parlor if they would help the week before. I gave the three clues in baggies and explained that next Saturday there would be three different teams from a treasure hunt who would ask for a banana split. They were to put a Baggie with a clue at the bottom of each banana split. To my amazement this came off without a hitch in the treasure hunt a week later. Amazing. Would never happen now.”
John Law recalls:
Small groups with different colored armbands as teams. I remember people in the crowds getting more than a little pissed at us for pushing past them to race across the parade route.
Later at pie fight: Chaotic as hell. Shirley Sheffield talking to a babyfaced MP from her hometown in South Carolina talks him into pieing her. I was watching this encounter and the chief officer (a lieutenant I believe) was, at that time standing atop a jeep/pick-up? Surveying the 50 or so pie covered nuts. He was trying to organize all into groups in some order so he could get everyone’s I.D. We were trying to be cooperative but were stupid-ineffective and silly. When he saw the young jarhead pie Shirley he literally threw his hands up in the air and a few seconds later started shouting over his bullhorn something like: Alright ALL OF YOU: get your stuff and GET OUT OF HERE. Please leave the Presidio…. Take your stuff and GO!!
Golden Gate Bridge Dinner
The Golden Gate Bridge Dinner was created by Catherine Baker and became one of signature events that was repeated each year, the other being the Treasure Hunt
Announcement in the very first nooseletter in Feb 1977
Here is the announcement a year later for the 2nd annual dinner:
Why I joined the Suicide Club
WHY I JOINED THE SAN FRANCISCO SUICIDE CLUB –David T. Warren
As the years slip by and I try to align each day with the passing of my life, I find myself on tenuous ground. After forty years of living, dreaming, and working to build the kind of community that I would like to live in, I find myself faced with the reality of how little I’ve done to accomplish this task. I haven’t tried. I am accompanied into the future with the lessons learned by my daily attendance in the school of hard sox. Though reality has popped my balloon I arrive at this point in time with the buoyancy to find a better way to live the remainder of my life than the way I’ve been doing it. Apparently life offers no stable, secure rounded fulfillment. Life at best is for me an untidy mess of unfinished business, broken achievements, personal failures, half-successes, short-lived triumphs, belated insights, noble desires and shameful deeds. Hopefully through the years I have accumulated a little wisdom; but for me life is incomplete and much potential remains;
it eludes my mortal grasp. Life as an ongoing state has controlled me more than I it. Like most people I’ve had my moments of breathtaking perfection, but no permanent achievement seems possible.
This may be because as a human being I am only part of any evolutionary process whose task it is to till the soil, learn the rules, build the technology and make ready for the people of the future, where necessity will require that basic human needs and wants be provided for by the collective of the community and individuals will be set free from hampering emotions of jealousy, fear, and rivalry. The fact that people will also lose their ability to hate, love, have hope, or be generous will have little effect on the world of the future that will operate with ant like
perfection into the millennia. Provided of course, that we don’t blow ourselves off the face of the earth or drown in the slime of increased pollution in the interim. For me, these alternatives are grim and bleak and leave so much to be desired that I’ve decided to become a charter member in the San Francisco Suicide Club. The only requirements are that I put my affairs in order, stop looking for satisfaction on a tomorrow that may never come, and live each day as though it were my last. With this commitment, I bequeath half of my worldly belongings to the club’s trinary garage sale, these
funds go to support the club’s bizarre activities. Going places I’ve never been and doing things I’ve never done. Maybe I’ll see you there!!
The San Francisco Suicide Club Description
THE SAN FRANCISCO SUICIDE CLUB DESCRIPTION
Have you ever explored a subterranean sewer at night with forty other people; climbed three stories on a swinging rope ladder to dine on the roof of a condemned building; staged practical jokes you’ve always fantasized about? No…? How about dinner at Rev. Moon’s or talking a policeman into hitting you with a pie? Well… we hadn’t either. The surviving members of the S.F. SUICIDE CLUB have agreed to EXPERIENCE THINGS THEY HAVEN’T EXPERIENCED BEFORE. In most cases they are challenges that we wouldn’t or couldn’t do alone because of the danger or need for team work. A large group also provides more investigators into the unknown, as uncovering mystery and adventure in the 20th Century requires a lot more detective work. Events generally fall into three categories: Adventures, infiltrations, and stunts. As you may notice in the above emphasized phrase, no WHY or PHILIOSOPHY is attached…
PURPOSE:
Fill in the blank yourself.
WHAT IT HAS NOT BEEN: So far, there has been no President, no voting, no meetings, no collectives, committees or consensus, no rules agreed on by everyone, no dares, no mandatory experiences. We do have initiations, but attendance at them is not required in order to participate in the club. We are neither secretive nor publicity seeking, but we also do not encourage the vicarious. Journalists or photographers must join the club and experience the events themselves in order to record them – we do not give armchair interviews.
HYSTERY:
On January 2, 1977 gale warnings were issued in San Francisco, and, at midnight, four friends unexplainedly found themselves holding onto handrails as 20 foot waves broke over them. Afterwards, they agreed they wanted to explore other such experiences in a larger group of friends. The SUICIDE CLUB was chosen as a name, based on the Robert Louis Stevenson story of a club that gamed at midnight, the losers forfeiting their lives. The name was chosen to alienate and frighten people away. It was offered in the Spring ’77 catalog of Communiversity, a San Francisco Alternative University without fees. Suicide Club initiation now follows Communiversity’s trinary catalog publications and registration on the 3rd Saturday of Feb. and June and on Halloween weekend.
The Club has two annual events: A Champagne Dinner on the Golden Gate Bridge on the last Friday of February and a MASSIVE TREASURE HUNT taking place amidst the chaos of the Chinese New Years Parade comprised of opposing teams, culminating in a water balloon and pie fight at the final destination on the last Saturday of February.
MEMBERSHIP:
The membership in the San Francisco Suicide Club is divided into three (3) separate, distinctive groups, one, associate, two, regular, and three, eternal members. To become an associate member you need only send _____ for ______ newsletters and your associate membership card, (on the back of your associate card is stamped a large ASS.) Your ASS.ociate membership card allows you to attend any of the events listed and become a regular member. To qualify for eternal membership a member must sponsor or convene an event for which they receive a Death certificate, (an event of some special achievement). Any member may convene or sponsor an event by completing and following through with the “Planned Chaos” form which are available to all members without charge.
San Francisco SUICIDE CLUB tee-shirts are available to $3.50, for anyone, member or not, who has gone on an event.
APPLICATIONS:
Application forms are your introduction to fantasy. Even if you don’t believe your ideas are realizable- Fantasize: ADVENTURES- INFILTRATIONS- STUNTS.
DECISION MAKING AND LEADERSHIP:
The individual creating an event is totally responsible for planning it and any rules to be followed. Their ideas on are not voted on, amended or censored; ultimately members vote with their feet. Convenors do write up what they feel were their mistakes in planning afterwards, if they want, and any subsequent rules they will offer for their next events as a 1) warning, or 2) assurance (depending on whether you like the rule or not). A Questionnaire- “Planned Chaos” is used for write-ups and includes the questions overlooked in the past.
RISK:
Possibility of physical injury and/or arrest is an ever-present part of many, but not all, adventures. These are not sought out and writeups usually attempt to detail their possibility and how the leader plans to avoid it. We are becoming very experienced in this area.
MAILING ADDRESS:
S.F. SUICIDE CLUB, P.O. BOX 7734,
S.F. CA. 94120
[Editors note 36 years later – don’t write to that PO box, sheesh! We lost it long ago. – Note that it sort of spells ‘HELL’ backwards 🙂 ]
The Club maintains the MUSUEM OF THE INCONSEQUENTIAL at 451 Judah at 10th Ave., open 2-7 pm, Mon-Sat. IT is a collection of the
disgusting, bizarre, and fun loving groups and events other denizens of the solar system have created.
DIVEST YOURSELF OF EXPECTATIONS SOLIDARITY IS A NECESSITY PLAY IT OUT TO THE END.
1st Initiation
Feb 2, 1977
(John Law remembers: Following is a fragment of a story I started about my impressions of this event.)
Certain hands, seemingly familiar with the task at hand, were the hands I felt gently guiding me out of the van that I had occupied for the last hour along with six or seven other similarly blindfolded initiates. The cops knew this routine: hand on subjects’ head, other hand solidly gripping the shoulder so as to avoid inflicting a nasty gash. These people weren’t police however and we weren’t criminals, at least not at all in the traditional sense of the word. We were a group of strangers who, with out yet realizing the import of our impending commitment were about to agree to put our worldly affairs in order and to live each day as if it were our last. Our guides had by now disgorged the dozen vehicles of their fifty or so sightless occupants and had, with doubtless more than a few comic misadventures lined us up all holding hands in a single queue in what was, trusting to my less prominent senses, a remote, unpopulated, seaside locale.
This events organizers had me convinced we were in for an adventure in the brilliant and mysterious vein of the weird/adventure writers that had so influenced my childhood. Among them were: Arthur Machen who with a finely manicured passage could invoke wonder and fear by revealing a chance encounter with some mysterious personage on a dense London night; H.P. Lovecraft a writer of rare power now virtually synonymous with Cosmic Horror; H. Ryder Haggard, Sax Rohmer & Robert E. Howard writers who peopled stories of parallel history with broad almost comic strokes yet with such exotic promise and descriptive passion that a guileless young reader could only wish to live in such lands. A. Conan Doyle, Kipling, Poe, so many to choose from so many worlds of wonder; then of course there was Robert Louis Stevenson. The premise for this brilliant adventure had of course been inspired by a spectral tale of Stevensons taken from the lesser known volume: “New Arabian Knights”. “The Suicide Club” is a tale, a fragment almost of what might have become a thrilling serial of the adventures of one Prince Florizel of Bohemia. The Prince, an exiled Prussian Royal loose in a fog shrouded Victorian London was accompanied on his incognito adventures by his military attaché the loyal Coronel ————-. Together they encounter the nefarious club during one of their periodic forays into a subterranean landscape replete with chance encounters and ominous suggestion. And so ensues an adventure of saturnalian character which taxes their formidable resources to the utmost. I had now been sightless for almost two hours and was getting an inkling of just how acute ones secondary senses can become during a prolonged absence of vision. The disembodied voices echoing about the van and the claustrophobic environs had been supplanted by a cool salt breeze, the steady murmur of distant breakers and the soft, constant pressure of the petite hand of an unknown woman to my right. Out of the cacophony of sensual bombardment and the confusion engendered by these unfamiliar, and unexplored tactile inputs, this simple holding of hands with a stranger was grounding me in a fashion unfamiliar to me in my at that time admittedly limited experience. I don’t recall who was to my left in this blind line up. The woman to my right, Katherine, was enjoying the proceedings as much as I. As our attendants prodded us forward through a new and genuinely unexplored world she and I grew deeply and inexplicably closer. Our conversation wasn’t profound by any stretch; however the singular quality of our conjoined experience seemed to usher us into an otherworldly mindset. We were assisted in traversing what seemed to be a chasm on a wet and slippery wooden beam. The precarious nature of this exercise was exponentially emphasized in my reeling mind by the knowledge that being hand in hand with at least 50 others my fate was tied to the blind equilibrium of chance.
The disguised prince and coronel visit the chambers of the Suicide Clubs Inner sanctum after being accosted in a dingy tavern by a frantic young man dispensing cream tarts. Various denizens of the night both noble and common are in this way invited to participate in what at first seems merely a charming diversion engineered for the casual enjoyment of the urban dilettante. Of course more is at stake than shallow entertainment as our heroes discover. Eventually they become aware of this mythic secret societies true nature. A desperate game of life and death ensues.
By now we had exhaustingly ascended a great hill on what seemed to be trails of sand alternating with wooden and earthen stairs. Katherine, I and doubtless all the others were winded and sweating. We could smell eucalyptus and hear the looming trees creak and sway in the cool breeze.
Blind though we were, the quality of darkness seemed to deepen as our other senses declared our passage from the brisk outside world into a ponderous, cloying interior space. The walls were concrete, and damp. The floor, also concrete, was uneven and littered with debris. We were led on and on into what was obviously a deeply subterranean place. The single line of people moving hand in hand seemed to be fragmenting.
Sounds and other input told Katherine and I that we were brushing past and in turn being overtaken by blind couples, individuals and small clots of our artificially handicapped peers. Finally, the resonance of odd echoes indicated that we two, along with what must have been most if not all the others had entered into a colossal chamber. A sonorous voice commanded we regain our sight. I heard Katherine gasp as she, I and the others removed our blindfolds. We had been sightless for over three hours and the expectation of regaining this most crucial of senses was so intense that when our eyes were freed, the shock of finding that we were still sightless was overwhelming. The chamber echoed with ominous bass laughter: we could almost feel the others tremble as they along with the two of us mentally reviewed our options. The same voice invited us to enjoy our stay and laughing again receded ever so quickly into the recesses of our strange new world. Katherine and I, ever more tightly holding on to one another began our search for light in earnest.
Blindfolded on the bus from the bookstore to the unknown destination (Fort Funston):
The Beginning
On January 2, 1977 gale warnings were issued in San Francisco, and, at midnight, four friends unexplainedly found themselves holding onto handrails as 20 foot waves broke over them. Afterwards, they agreed they wanted to explore other such experiences in a larger group of friends. The SUICIDE CLUB was chosen as a name, based on the Robert Louis Stevenson story of a club that gamed at midnight, the losers forfeiting their lives. The name was chosen to alienate and frighten people away.













